Archive for May, 2008

Eurovision, Greek Fest, Bayou Boogaloo, and…

Saturday, May 24th, 2008

The Turkish party – party of the year as it was called by a fellow Turk – at Fatma’s house! A weekend jammed packed with more fun that one human can endure.

I’ve yet to walk just two blocks over to the Boogaloo – a free festival with music, food and art market. I’ve not gotten over to the Greek Church for the Greek Festival, although I heard this year it is bigger than ever! I’ve not even looked up Eurovision today – knowing my sweetheart will tell me all about it later – but I AM GOING TO THE TURKISH PARTY OF THE YEAR – that I will not miss.

Lunch with Mom at Adam’s – speaking of Turks – first we sat on the screen porch and played iwth Bam and had an ice cold Tecate wtih a squeeze of lime – then we went to Sailor’s and had delicious charbroiled oysters – she said it was her favorite meal we have had so far – and I agree.

Work expands to fit the time allotted

Friday, May 23rd, 2008

Enough says the chair I have been sitting in. Enough says Loca on her back, paws straight up in the air. Enough says the bells at Cabrini ringing the 6:00 chimes. Enough say my dry eyes. Enough says my brain that can’t process or hold one more data point.

HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND!

Bayou Boogaloo began about an hour ago outside – bands are playing, food is being served, people are walking around with cocktails. I’m off to my favorite Friday haunt – Swirl – to see my friends and raise a glass or two.

TGIF.

T minus 9

Friday, May 23rd, 2008

The Turks say “Whoever the heart loves, she is the beauty.” But what they neglect to say is that the lover makes you feel beautiful too. I remember my encounter with the mesmerizer – because no emotion was fed back from it, I wondered if there was something wrong with me – too fat, didn’t shave my legs, too eager, not eager enough? But when someone loves you, you feel strong, and beautiful, and brave.

The truth is that without someone I feel strong, beautiful and brave – but when I took these elements out to the world the men and women I was interested in reported back “you are not” and actually “you are scary.” As strong as my self-esteem is, it is a little unnerving to have the mating call and response negate all of my own self assessments. So when the response comes back with a resounding YES – it’s like WOW – BAM, SHAZAM, KAPOW – my portrait of Wonder Woman as my alter ego is painted with deeper hues and turns 3D and so yes, the one I love is beautiful and rare as an exotic flower, but the way she loves me makes me more beautiful still.

Ottoman wisdom through the ages

Friday, May 23rd, 2008

T cited a Turkish saying the other day – “the guest wants the other guests to leave” – I thought of that last night when Bam Bam was hissing at first Loca, who was crawling guerilla style trying to charm him and then Arlene, who was content to stare through Bam in her geriatric way but was doing no real harm. I scolded Bambushka and said, dude, stop it, you were last in.

The actual saying is “The guest is not welcome to a guest, but both are not to the host.” And when I told the scenario by which T came to the quote and then retold it about how it pertains to Bam to my mother last night, she said, “But no one is a guest there, they are family.” Got to love her.

In looking up the proverb or saying, I came across a great website of Turkish sayings – this one in particular made me laugh – “To the lazy every day is a holiday” – only because it provided levity toward my integrity musings.

I’ll leave you with a few Ottoman proverbs, if you don’t have time to visit the site:

“You do not practice what you know; why, then, do you seek what you do not know?”

“Envy consumes good deeds as fire consumes wood”

“Happy is he whose own faults prevent him from castigating the faults of others”

“The person who repents is like the one who has never sinned”

“Seek knowledge even in China”

“It is unlawful to withhold knowledge”

“The ink of the scholar is more precious than the blood of martyrs”

“Promising is a debt”

“A good word is a charity”

“Contentment is an inexhaustible treasure”

“True wealth is not abundance in property but a generous heart”

“Make things easy, not difficult, and bring joy, not hatred”

“Actions are valued by their consequences”

“Actions are valued by their intentions, and every man shall have but that which he intended”

“Earn and dine or else fast.”

Oh to read again…

Friday, May 23rd, 2008

I’ve been lamenting my lack of time in reading – I used to consume novels – now I am still reading the same novel T gave me for my birthday – two pages a night – and that requires rereading the page I left off on when I dozed off – so that is actually one page read and one reread each night.

My sabbatical is whetting my appetite for books – four weeks – what will I read? A mix of light summer fare, a good heavy mind altering book, and something visual and intoxicating as only a good book can provide.

Serendipitously this article appeared in the NYT this morning:

May 23, 2008
BOOKS
Volumes to Go Before You Die

By WILLIAM GRIMES
An odd book fell into my hands recently, a doorstopper with the irresistible title “1001 Books You Must Read Before You Die.” That sounds like a challenge, with a subtle insult embedded in the premise. It suggests that you, the supposedly educated reader, might have read half the list at best. Like one of those carnival strength-testers, it dares you to find out whether your reading powers rate as He-Man or Limp Wrist.

The book is British. Of course. The British love literary lists and the fights they provoke, so much so that they divide candidates for the Man Booker Prize into shortlist books and longlist books. In this instance Peter Boxall, who teaches English at Sussex University, asked 105 critics, editors and academics — mostly obscure — to submit lists of great novels, from which he assembled his supposedly mandatory reading list of one thousand and one. Quintessence, the British publishers, later decided that “books” worked better than “novels” in the title.

Even without Milton or Shakespeare, Professor Boxall has come up with a lot of books. Assume, for the sake of argument, that a reasonably well-educated person will have read a third of them. (My own score, tallied after I made this estimate, was 303.) That leaves 668 titles. An ambitious reader might finish off one a month without disrupting a personal reading program already in place. That means he or she would cross the finish line in the year 2063. At that point, upon reaching the last page of title No. 1,001, “Never Let Me Go” by Kazuo Ishiguro, death might come as a relief.

Two potent factors make “1001 Books” (published in the United States in 2006 by Universe; $34.95) compelling: guilt and time. It plays on every serious reader’s lingering sense of inadequacy. Page after page reveals a writer or a novel unread, and therefore a demerit on the great report card of one’s cultural life. Then there’s that bullying title, with its ominous allusion to the final day when, for all of us, the last page is turned.

I appreciate the sense of urgency because I feel it myself. But when Professor Boxall brings death into the picture, he sets the bar very high. Let’s have a look at some of these mandatory titles. Not only is it not necessary to read “Interview With the Vampire” by Anne Rice before you die, it is also probably not necessary to read it even if, like Lestat, you are never going to die. If I were mortally ill, and a well-meaning friend pressed Anaïs Nin’s “Delta of Venus” into my trembling hands, I would probably leave this world with a curse on my lips.

If the “1001 Books” program seems quirky, even perverse, it’s no accident. “I wanted this book to make people furious about the books that were included and the books that weren’t, figuring this would be the best way to generate a fresh debate about canonicity, etc.,” Professor Boxall informed me in an e-mail message. And how.

The tastes of others are always inexplicable, but “1001 Books” embodies some structural irregularities. Arranged chronologically, it begins with the novel’s primordial period — everything up to 1800 — and then marches century by century into the present.

More than half the books were written after World War II. Already I feel my hackles rising. Does not the age of Balzac, Dickens, Dostoyevsky and Tolstoy dwarf its earnest, fitfully brilliant but ultimately punier successor? And if the 20th century can put up a fight, the real firepower is concentrated in the period of 1900 to 1930. Like many others, I admire Ian McEwan, but does he really merit eight novels on the list, to Balzac’s three?

Something is wrong here. Paul Auster gets six novels. Don DeLillo seven. Thackeray gets one: “Vanity Fair.”

Because nearly all the contributors hail from Britain and its former colonial possessions, there is a marked English-language bias and a tendency to favor obscure British novelists over obscure Spanish or Italian ones. Fair enough. A French or Russian version of “1001 Books” would impose its own prejudices. In fact, prejudice is what you want in a book like this, which works best as an annotated tip sheet for hungry readers on the prowl for overlooked writers and neglected works.

The United States gets a fair shake, and there may even be some overcompensation. Philip Roth shows up with no fewer than seven novels, including “The Breast,” and Edith Wharton is honored for four novels in addition to the two big ones, “The House of Mirth” and “The Age of Innocence.”

A little more Anglophilia might have been in order. Anthony Powell shows up with “A Dance to the Music of Time” — which is actually 12 novels, so Professor Boxall cheats — but I would have made a play for a few of the pre-“Dance” novels, like “Venusberg” or “Afternoon Men.”

On the other hand, the 20th-century bias eliminates Americans like Stephen Crane and William Dean Howells entirely, and a certain weakness for postmodernism squeezes out novels like “An American Tragedy” by Theodore Dreiser and “The Octopus” by Frank Norris. Drop a couple of Austers, and there would have been room.

As an experiment, I picked three novels, more or less at random, to see how they might change my quality of life: “Castle Rackrent” by Maria Edgeworth; “Tarka the Otter” by Henry Williamson; and “The Invention of Curried Sausage” by Uwe Timm.

Two of the three definitely provided a lift. “Castle Rackrent” (1800), a rollicking satire about trashy English aristocrats who bring ruin to an Irish estate, is worth reading just for the name Carrick O’Fungus, although literary historians prize it for being the first regional novel. That’s fine. Bonus points for getting there first, but the real reason to pick it up is Edgeworth’s slyly vicious picture of slovenly aristos on the loose.

Uwe Timm, a contemporary German writer unknown to me, now flies very high on my mental Amazon rankings. “The Invention of Curried Sausage” (1993) is an offbeat quest novel. The narrator, seeking the origins of currywurst, a German fast-food specialty, quizzes an elderly vendor and winds up with a big, fat history lesson. The issues are big, the prose brilliant, the execution deft. Eternal gratitude to Andrew Blades, theater reviewer for Stage magazine, who convinced Professor Boxall that this novel belonged on the list.

Tarka turned out to be too much otter for me, even though the back story is compelling. Williamson, returning from the trenches after World War I, took up a hermit’s life in north Devon, where he lived among the plants and the animals, observing closely and shunning humankind. “Tarka,” published in 1927, tells the story of a young male otter and its day-to-day struggles for food, a mate and security in a world populated by baying dogs and evil men. T. E. Lawrence loved it. I didn’t.

Since Professor Boxall is keen to start an argument, let me oblige. Drop the bloated, self-indulgent “Ada” from an otherwise correct Nabokov list (“Lolita,” “Pale Fire,” “Pnin”) and insert “Laughter in the Dark” or “The Gift.” J. M. Coetzee, with 10 novels, can afford to lose 1 or 2. That would open up space for “The Cossacks” by Tolstoy and “A Hero of Our Time” by Mikhail Lermontov. There should be another five Balzacs. I could go on and on.

One problem with drawing up recommended-reading lists is the urge to show off. No one gets points for proposing “The Brothers Karamazov.” Credibility comes with books like “The Ravishing of Lol V. Stein” by Marguerite Duras, or the reverse-chic audacity of insisting that “The Godfather” belongs on the same list as “The Trial.”

A little humility is in order. Easy for me to bring up “Envy” by Yuri Olyesha because I happen to have read it, or Jakob Arjouni, a German writer of Turkish descent who counts as one of my latest discoveries, largely because I was seduced by the title of a recent story collection, “Idiots.”

As a reality check, I opened “1001 Books” at random and beheld “A Kestrel for a Knave,” by Barry Hines, which I have not read, followed by “In Watermelon Sugar” by Richard Brautigan (ditto) and “The German Lesson” by Siegfried Lenz (started it, put it down, meant to get back to it, never did). No matter how well read you are, you’re not that well read. If you don’t believe it, pick up “1001” and start counting.

In his novel “Changing Places,” David Lodge — not on the list — introduces a game called Humiliation. Players earn points by admitting to a famous work that they have not read. The greater the work, the higher the point score. An obnoxious American academic, competing with a group of colleagues, finally gets the hang of the game and plays his trump card: “Hamlet.” He wins the game but is then denied tenure.

That’s the thing with reading lists like “1001 Books.” There’s always that host of the unread.

Come to think of it, I have a personal white whale: “Moby-Dick.” I really must read it before I die.

Copyright 2008 The New York Times Company

The LaLa Zoo

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

Welcome to the LaLa Zoo – there are no zookeepers – there are only assorted inhabitants who all converge in one room to sleep and then all disperse when they wake up to separate areas of the compound. Everyone gets fed from their own plate but it is a requirement that you sit down to eat – only Bam Bam doesn’t adhere to this rule. We speak many languages and even within our normal native tongue we have variations – like Loca in the kennel in the morning with her “a wooo,” or Bam with his “m ow” or Arlene with her shrill get out of my face bark, or my own “This is Rachel Dangermond” phone answering voice or T’s Zsa Zsa way of speaking – “Super darling, million kisses, love you.” Never a dull moment.

Eurovision – Round #2

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

Check out this blog on Eurovision round 2.

Did you know that Eurovision has been around since about 1956 or something like that?

The Israeli, Boaz, is still one of the top picks.

Here is another blog following – love the tag lines – Eurovision:

Ukraine (bondage).

Croatia (septuagenarian rapper).

Albania (slacks).

Iceland (Dr Alban).

Georgia (silver boots).

Denmark (two first names).

Sweden (proper diva).

Latvia (pirates).

Turkey (surprise surprise).

Portugal (upholstery).

 

Why integrity matters in a connected world

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

A friend writes after reading my blog entry on integrity about a book I might be interested in reading on the topic. See below – very intriguing. I ordered it today. 


 
    

Success no longer lies in what we do; how we do what we do now matters most. In a world where information flows and technology connects us instantly around the globe, the rules of the game for business today have changed dramatically. In HOW: Why How we Do Anything Means Everything…in Business (and in Life)Dov Seidman presents a clear vision of this new world and tells the compelling story how everyone can thrive within it.In a connected world, individuals and organizations that make the strongest connections win. In the past, our products and services – our whats – were our keys to success.

 

Today, whats have become commodities, easily duplicated or reverse engineered. Sustainable advantage and enduring success – for both companies and the people who work for them – now lie in the realm of how.

From this simple ideas flows an entirely new way of looking at business and life in the 21st century. Today, how we behave and interact with others is the ultimate differentiator. The qualities that most once thought of as “soft” – integrity, passion, humility, and truth – have become the hard currency of business success and the most powerful drivers of reputation and profitability. Whether you are a business executive, manager, or employee, HOW will transform your thinking. Divided into four comprehensive parts, this insightful book:

  • Explains the forces and factors that have fundamentally changed the world, placing a new focus on the how’s with which you conduct yourself in business and in life;
  • Provides a new framework for your thinking to help you understand and implement a more effective approach to your decisions so that you can play to your strengths; take action based on knowing what you should do, not what you can do; and learn to create consonance in all your interactions;
  • Shows you how to rethink your actions and decisions to thrive in today’s new business realities by marketing with transparency, building trust and earning your reputation; and
  • Introduces a new type of business culture that companies must strive to build based on principles of organizational self-governance and a comprehensive new leadership framework that every reader will find fascinating and inspiring.

With in-depth insight and practical advice, HOW will help you bring excellence and significance to your personal life and your business endeavors and refocus your ideas and thought patterns in powerful new ways.

Author Dov Seidman and HOW has been featured on ABC’s Good Morning AmericaBusiness Week.comTheStreet.comMotley Fool.comForbes.comPBS’s Charlie Rose, and in the New York Times, and has appeared at the National Press Club (in conversation with New York Times columnist Thomas Freidman), the Core Club in Washington D.C., and the Rand Corporation.

If you want to stand out, to thrive in our fast-changing, hyperconnected and hypertransparent world, discover HOW.

Coming and going

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

I went down Orleans Avenue to NOAC yesterday and ran into a huge police barricade and saw what looked like a scene from New Orleans CSI with a police officer walking out of a house with gloves and you could just tell it was a murder scene.

I felt like a duck had walked over my grave so when I was headed home I took Esplanade Avenue and there I was stopped by a police car that was pulled over – a bike thrown carelessly in the middle of the road – and an officer shoving a perp into the back of the police car.

I called my mom and she said makes me not want to leave the house – and I said, tell me about it, as I rushed home to the LaLa and gathered around the animals for comfort.

Waking up with yourself

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

I spent the evening thinking about the word integrity and trying not to buy too strongly into any moral outrage or pull that I’ve been having over a series of issues and events that have recently occurred near me. I have been the victim of soapbox preachers – a niece who won’t speak to me because of an affair and a brother who thinks it is wrong for me to love a woman. So I certainly don’t want to be the one who grabs the microphone. The more I read over the description that Stanford put out about integrity the more I realized what it means to me – it means: waking up with yourself.

I watched my husband of 16 years behave with utmost integrity particularly when I handed him a bomb. I’ve seen several of my closest friends without hesitation do the right thing when they could have gotten away with far more. I remember my niece telling my brother that driving safely was an obligation he had to not hurt others (everyone in my family drives like crazy).

So I came to this understanding of what integrity means to me … I have a relationship with myself and I am proud of who I am and what I do. And I maintain the tenets of that relationship not because it will lead to personal gain (because often, sadly, it does not), but because when I wake up with myself in the morning I like who I see in the mirror and that is who I portray to the world at large. For this, there is no remuneration, no accolades, no gold stars – there is only me, myself and I … and of course, the smile on my face.