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S – my contractor – said that a woman in Metairie needed all her windows and baseboards trimmed out and the estimate was $31,000 for a three bedroom house.

I can’t find J, because he left his phone in someone’s car the other night when he was out getting loaded. I need him to come get this trash and haul it to the dump. K said “I know you don’t like me to tell you problems” (sigh) “but, I saw a rat the other night when I was closing up.” I said yes, I saw him too, he lives under the house and I’ve named him Nick.

The tile setter started today with his helper. I went by to bring P&T, Steve’s sons, extra Tung oil and Poly Coat and steel wool to redo the columns since the MORONS who worked for Schild Construction – Orion and what’s his name – wrapped the bubble wrap so all the water would stay in the columns when it rained. V was there doing the roof – he put the awning roof up and the side pan under the large window that looks at the bayou. And he was working on the transition roof. I asked him if he could fix the leak from where the a/c guys ran a pipe up through the main gable, which has now ruined the ceiling sheetrock, which was all nice and taped and floated. Ahem.

Meanwhile K asked if he could speak to me in private. He says he feels like he has been in a whirlwind since returning – that he feels out of the loop because I’m not talking to him directly and that I didn’t take the time to introduce him to C, the tile setter. We started trying to have a conversation but as usual he made me madder and madder till I blew. I told him that is why I go through Steve because I can’t take his patronizing tone of voice and the fact that he has to be handled with kit gloves because he is so goddamn emotional about everything. He said that N is moving out and he’s been having trouble with him, and now his other son, the hottie, S, is not going to be working with him either, so he knows he has issues that he is not working on. So I took a deep breath and told him that it all comes down to this – I have a full time job and I can’t get sucked into lengthy discussions about whether to use a 5 x 8 or 2 x 4 because honestly, I don’t know the answers to these questions. I said that I don’t appreciate his patronizing tone of voice when I do make a decision. And I said I feel that he holds me hostage with his passive aggressiveness QED the rubber roof for the terrace. He said he feels unappreciated and it affects him and he doesn’t have an answer on the rubber roof.

We agreed to try to get along because at this point my choices are slimming.

At the same time, I still don’t have an answer about the rubber roof. But I know that C, the tile setter, is in the master bathroom right now, undoing what someone else did – where the floor furnace register was is a hole that some asshole – let’s call him Orion or whatever the moron #2 who worked for Schild Construction was used BEAD BOARD STRIPS to fix and then stuck a piece of plywood on top of it. GOOD FUCKING LORD!

Meanwhile L – my plumber – was a no show – because after having taken a vacation day, he called in sick today – gone fishing I suspect – so I called M, the owner, and we caught up on the phone. M went through a bitter divorce that dragged out for five years. He was surprised how “quick and easy” mine went. I said well quick maybe, not easy. He assured me someone would be out there tomorrow to put the rubber drain pans in. He also said that for him although things were not still in the frenzy they had been, he had done 8 estimates yesterday so work is still nutty and strong.

Dinner with mom tonight – it’s Monday in New Orleans, so it’s red beans and rice for dinner. I brought the red beans and she made the rice. I’ve been a little miffed at her. My niece’s baby shower passed a few weekends ago, and she missed it because she just couldn’t get five miles down the road. Meanwhile she was bemoaning not attending some ne’erdewells wedding where she works (she’s known this woman for five months).

When she started moaning about no one calling her or coming to visit I told her that it takes two to tango. My grandmother – her mother – consistently sent me a birthday card with some cash in it every year of my life. My mother can’t remember her daughter’s birthday most of the time much less her grandchildren. I told her what endeared me to my grandmother was that she was always there – that consistency mattered.

I said even if you didn’t go, you could have sent a card. She got miffed at me.

Whatyagonnado?

B opened up Sip in MidCity through a licensing agreement with the owners of Sip on Magazine – we love Sip. Every Tuesday night is Sip & Spin. One night the music that was spinning was all Stevie Nicks all the time – and seeings how my hair is so shaggy and I used to be her double in the 70s, this was one of my favorite nights. Also Summer of Love or French Hip Hop. Anyway, they have free tastings on Friday night and this one coming up is Italian night and I’m going to make baked ziti Soprano’s style. What the hell – I have no place to entertain yet – might as well do it at their place and entertain the masses.

G’s back from her brother’s wedding and she’s feeling like she can’t live here. She’s having anniversary issues. She’s having issues with no services. She’s mixed on the mayor’s response to NY and his apology. She’s not sure about a lot of things – B, J, being here, moving away.

There’s one thing I can say to all of this – I don’t want to live in Knoxville.

Today was vacation day but not – had a special project to call in for at work and then the LaLa became overwhelmingly demanding. C, the tile setter, called at the last minute to say that he had a job cancel and now had a month and a half ahead of him that he was free and could do my tile. He came over and Steve met us there and basically he’s ready to go but I got to get the plumber to come put the rubber pan in. So he gives me a quote. Steve whispers he thinks it is going to be $4500 or $5000 for the whole job – but C comes back and says $10,000 for just the two bathrooms and Steve almost passes out. I was a little faint myself. I talked him down to $7500 and told him to start and gave him a check as a down payment.

Now here’s the deal – he is quoting $25/sf – Steve says the going rate is $4/sf – but that is for that cheap ass tile you buy from Home Depot – this is expensive glass tile and I have seen it installed incorrectly and it looks bad. I’ve seen C’s work uptown and it is perfect. My friends L&M live uptown – their quote to do glass tile in a bathroom equal to the size of both of mine was $10K pre-Katrina three years ago. So I took a deep breath and decided this just is what it is.

I spoke to Steve Kohls – my contractor today – and told him the windows are on their way in and I need the columns refinished by his son P or T, whoever can get to it, he said he has three sons down sick right now. Meanwhile, he said that K hadn’t decided if he was going to lay the rubber flooring on the terrance or not and I lost it. Deep breath.

I called Hank at the urging of the Snake and N – and he wasn’t in so the bartender asked me the message – I gave her my name and number and she said what’s this in reference to – and I said well Travis kicked me out of the bar Saturday night because I told him to fuck off after he shoved me out of the way. She said man, he was in a nasty mood that night – I’ve never seen him that way. I said well I don’t care what his mood is, I think it is highly irregular to get kicked out of any New Orleans bar much less for telling someone to fuck off who has just usurped your place in line. She said I totally agree – I’m sorry you went through that – it should never happen in New Orleans.

I invited Ms. Marie who lives directly across the bayou from me to come tomorrow for the commemoration. She was pimping her son to me the other day saying “look how he likes dogs” when he was petting Arlene. Ms. Marie is 93 years old. She’s the one H was referring to when she said I am going to live a long happy life in my house on the bayou as evidenced by Ms. Marie – the bayou encourages longevity and happiness in its residents.