One more for the road

My friend R IM’d me this morning to say he had broken up with his Italian girlfriend – “so fn sad” he writes – she’s headed back to Italy plus ‘she didn’t want to have babies” – he wanted to know how I was doing with yet another hurricane bearing down on my general area. Told him I was mid to partly cloudy. He asked if I am depressed and said don’t think so. He said well don’t be you are well-loved and well-limbed.

Last night after a day of tearful phone calls – one with N (cry over Arlene), one with mom (Arlene and Rita), one with L (Arlene, Rita and K) – I was exhausted by the end of the day – I wanted to cry myself to sleep but instead just lay there looking at the light through the blinds. Earlier had to rally to go see Lucinda – S opted to stay home with the Bean because she had just returned from the hospital. L was here and could watch her but there was this tense moment when we were discussing so in order not to impose, he stayed. Didn’t miss much – the warm up band was barely warm. And Lucinda was good but in the end not great – something kind of blah – plus I drank too much bourbon – ack – not a good drink for me because I go from 0 to 100 in short time. But couldn’t help myself because felt like I was being pulled down to a dark well and was railing against it. In the end, think the dark side might have won because a window opened and I didn’t necessarily look through but what I saw made me shake my head.

Sometimes I think I just should exchange brains with someone else because I am sick of what I know.

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