My friend up north asks me in an email: can you teach a man to kiss?
HELL FUCKING NO!
Kissing is the end all, be all, the everything, the motherlode, and you cannot teach a man to kiss, unless he is four, and then you shouldn’t be teaching him to kiss.
On this subject, I do not waiver – rule of thumb – deal breaker – call it what you’d like, but it is black and white: Can’t kiss? Lose my number.