Use everything
Yesterday, early evening I did not go on my bike ride so I could join my friend’s Zoom life coaching call. Veronica’s a warm and wonderful friend, and I’ve been the beneficiary of her coaching largesse on multiple occasions.
My take away from last night’s forum was “use everything” – Veronica’s mantra that all of it – the relationship crap, the coronavirus pandemic, the under-earning, the life struggle whatever it is is there for our learning, growth and upliftment.
True enough for me – every sucker punch has taught me how scrappy I truly am. Yet, this time, it’s different. I don’t hear this aloud but I hear it in the undertones of the jokes and memes that circulate on social media or get sent to my phone – we are okay.
We are surviving a pandemic! That’s pretty big.
What being scrappy means is I’ve learn that this too shall pass, but having gone through the biggest upheaval in my life – the 2005 Federal Flood – I just don’t want to go back to business as usual. I don’t have that REBUILD OR LEAVE motto waiting to spit off my tongue.
We survived, but now what?
Friends from near and far have been calling and getting in touch. I have a lot to say to a handful of people, some to say to a few people, and then my ability to process on the phone with distant friends drops to an “uh huh”, “yes, we’re okay” and “stay well.” Perfunctory courtesy and platitudes are all I have.
Meanwhile, there is a dim lightbulb trying to come alive as I walk and gaze absentmindedly at the blue waters of the Gulf of Mexico – actually it is a multitude of bulbs and they surround a marquis that says when this time out is over, I’m not going back.
I don’t want what was – the constant constant – I don’t want one bit of it. I don’t want a new chapter – I’ve done chapters – I’m ready for a new book.
April 16th, 2020 at 2:20 am
Hey — i love your writing — do you have a draft of your new book. No more new life chapters but a new life book. I feel and hear you.
April 16th, 2020 at 9:36 am
Wanda!!! You know I’m already designing the cover in my mind, it’s a Phoenix rising from the ashes – over and over she rises – but this time her plumage is purple, some feathers red, and gold tips, and all that!