How to speak to your child about death
If you have stumbled upon this site asking yourself that question, then go somewhere else. Today, with my almost six year old in the backseat, a discussion began innocently enough. How old are you Mommy?
I’ll be 56 this year, and you will be six. You can always remember how old I am by adding 50 to how old you are.
So when I’m 7
I’ll be 57
And when I’m 8
I’ll be 58
And when I’m 9
on and on we went till he was 20 and I was 70, but then he said, and when I’m 100
I’ll be dead
What?
[count, 1, 2, 3 then]
TEARS * SOBBING * HEAVY BREATHING
I don’t want you to be dead! Why do you have to be dead!
Honey, every thing that lives dies, but that is not going to happen for a long time.
Will Stella die? Will Heidi die? Will I die?
Every being is born, lives and grows old and dies. That’s the cycle of life. We are all going to live a long life hopefully and we won’t have to think about anything but living for now.
I don’t want to die! I want to play! I want to be a kid! Will I get to be born again?
Maybe. I don’t know.
[I pull over, he gets out of his seat, and comes over and gets in my lap, sobbing as I try to comfort him in my arms.]
* * * *
Yes, keep moving, don’t pause here to find out how to speak to your child about death.
