Fake it till you become it

My mother told me she didn’t know where I got my confident attitude from – she said she would see me walking out of school when she came to pick me up and my confidence made me stand out from the rest.

So maybe it’s no coincidence that a long time ago I mastered the ability to FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT, which stayed with me for most of my adult life – up until I went sideways for a while and then got back on track.

A friend posted a TED talk today and you have to watch it till the end where she personalizes the experience, which is when I say HURRAH!!! Learning how to be self-actualized and then using that skill to help someone else become so is the greatest gift in the world.

This week was to be my busy week, my finally out of the weeds in every other thing week, so that I can focus week, on work that pays the bills week, and so it began with Tatjana leaving for Spain and Tin getting sick. Two days into this week, where work has gone awry and a four year old under my wing could have made me go bonkers, but instead, I flourished.

I gave up on what was on my list and focused on what was presented to me. A little boy with a high fever who had one parent leave for a month – and he was CLINGY – and he kept telling me he loved me like he meant it and so I sat with him in the rocker, I sat by him on the sofa, I laid near him in his bed, I sat across from him on the floor, I sat and rocked him, hugged him up, and loved on him.

When we had sick day redux this morning (his fever had broken), I decided to get some things done that have been on my alternate to do list – my homestead exemption, my eyeglasses that were tweaked from Tin stepping on them and my new sunglasses that needed prescription lenses, the paint I needed for an art project, the moisturizer I hadn’t had time to pick up – I got it all done with Tin in tow and managed to get some lunch in him at the same time.

One thing that I’ve been working on in my life is to roll with it – whatever it is – and to not worry about what gets pushed aside for what shows up. Yesterday and today, I put my motto into practice – fake it till you make it – I will be someone who doesn’t have an anxiety attack about missing work, I’ll be someone who doesn’t worry – and today, I faked it till I became it.

I actually enjoyed myself the last two days and I think so has Tin – amazing what you can do with yourself when you put your mind and body to it:

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