Where do paranoid crack addict inventors go? They work at the Sky Mall

In the Sky Mall catalog there were three items that stood out as more than mere curiosities – there was something sinister about their concept as if created by delusional crack addict inventors tinkering away in their garages having an ah ha moment that was chemically induced. 1) Dryer Vent Brush $12.99 #131839A – “over time, lint accumulates inside your dryer and that can cause a vent fire and reduce air flow…the 10 foot long brush extends into the vent to remove lint build up. [How many people do you know have ever talked about dryer vent fires?] 2) Driveway Net $89.99 #25346A – “kids need boundaries…the Driveway Net shows kids just how far they can go!’ [and just how far parents can go by erecting a bright orange plastic fence that screams moron to their offspring] and last but not least 3) Breakfix Cereal Dispenser $79.91 “with the automatic Breakfix Cereal Dispenser fixing the day’s first meal will never again be a messy, time consuming chore, the touch of a button dispenses a premeasured portion of cereal. [Come on – cereal?]

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