Dangermond.org

I liken the multiple losses I have experienced in the past year or so to a death, which would make the last year of posts almost like reciting Kaddish for me. Kaddish is the prayer that Jews say for their close loved ones for eleven months after they pass and then it becomes a one year anniversary event.

This morning, before dawn, I met with the Zen master teacher for Dokusan* at MidCity Zen and I had my questions ready. One question was given to me by Jim, who owns Meaux Bar, and it was this: “Why have I been chosen to this personal invitation; what qualities do you see in me that I have not acknowledged in myself?”

I didn’t ask this question because like all things in life, you can plan on what you are going to do, but you really don’t know what you will do until the matter is at hand. So on my knees in a dimly lit alcove on a black cushion tucked quietly away in a shotgun in MidCity, I met the master teacher and I bowed.

What do you practice with these days?

I didn’t understand the question, which is apropos for me and life’s events. We discussed how I had come to Zen (read: crisis).

Crises brings us to the threshold and fear holds us in its grip.

Is there passion in Zen?

Zen is living. When you cross the threshold, the walls go away, and joy is everywhere.

I closed my eyes and the scene changed – the dimly lit background and shadowy figure reversed to a lit figure in a dimly lit background. And then I bowed and took my leave.

Joseph Campbell says that we should celebrate all thresholds with ceremony. This was mine. I liken the last month as being truly alive. I have crossed to the other side from death, and as the master said to me, there is no way back.

*Dokusan offers the opportunity to present the state of your practice to the teacher for comment and instruction. It is a chance to ask questions, discuss difficulties, and most basically, reveal who you are at that very moment.

This entry was posted on Friday, March 15th, 2013 at 11:31 am and is filed under Main. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.