Chapter 1, Book 4
I finally got out of the house or rather the bed this morning after being down for the count since Thursday. I took Loca to the park and was surprised to see the winterized version of it. It was supposed to snow on the northshore last night – brrr – that is cold for us here in the Gulf South. I was still coming out of a fog, the sort of new realization of my mom’s passing. I look forward to the memories of the last seven months being erased and supplanted by all the wonderful memories of my mother when she was vital and herself. But as a colleague wrote, this passage is “life defining.” Another colleague wrote about the passing of her own father saying she watched her big Italian ox of a father tethered to all the medical know hows that know nothing. She wrote, “What comforted me in the end was knowing that we didn’t have to worry any more, and that the celebration of his life would never end in my heart.”
And so that brings me to Chapter 1, Book 4. Book 1 was having two parents, then losing my larger than life father, Book 2 was finding my life as an adult that included too many miscarriages, Katrina, the end of a long and happy marriage, and Book 3 was the restoration and rejoining with my mother and sadly, her eventual death.
Chapter 1, Book 4 holds lots of promise. My father gave me courage and my mother gave me my free spirit. My intention is to use both to their best advantage. Despite the drawbacks we have had with our road to adoption, the night I flew back from NY for my mom’s funeral, we got a call. And then today another. This part and many others remain unwritten.