What is time?
I’m trying to understand this time thing. I mean I was at someone’s birthday party last night – they turned 55 – in 7 years I will be 55. What will I be doing? Who will I be doing it with?
Right now some people have such huge importance in my life – they take up the real estate in my mind – will these people be at my 55th birthday party? Will someone be throwing me a surprise party?
It all rattles my cage. I am trying hard to be in the present – to enjoy what life offers me today – which is a lot of great stuff – but I find myself drumming my fingertips on the countertops, pacing in a small circle, hoping, pining, longing, wanting instead of what I should be doing – breathing, enjoying, luxuriating in all that is good around me – love and happiness.
It’s that feeling you have that you’re ready – you’re at the gate, you’re pawing the ground, you’re head is light as a balloon, and you’re ready to go – ready to start running and running like a prized stallion – but wait? no one fired the gun yet, no one agreed to the race yet, no one is opening the door.