The antisocial media
I was reading through Facebook and came across an entry from a friend who was taking her daughter along with six other girls out for the day. After struggling through four days of Tin’s defiant mood and my single-parentdom, I wanted desperately to hit the DISLIKE button but there wasn’t one.
When I’m glazing over the FB entries and trying to reconcile how I have no time for much in my life anymore, I wonder what I am doing there. What do I see that makes me go there? It’s almost like ice cream. I love ice cream, but I go sometimes years before I eat ice cream. Put it in my face and I will scarf it down as if I am a seasoned ice cream eating professional, the truth being something else. The other night I was at my neighbor’s house and other neighbors were there and were waxing rapturously about a new Kleinpeter Creme ice cream she had seen on a billboard. “We’re big ice cream eaters,” she said to me, and described all the places they went looking for this ice cream – Dorignac’s, Martin’s, Rouse’s, Whole Food. It meant nothing to me, but if they had put that Kleinpeter Creme whatever ice cream in front of me instead, I would have eaten it as if it were laced with nicotine.
I loved Linked In, I like that it is job site where I can update my resume and make contact with the people I do business with, unfortunately I can update my resume but I can’t really make contact with my colleagues because my sources in industry are anonymous. And recently, after joining some groups on Linked In, I got irritated by some banal questions that were being circulated around groups, such as this one in my New Orleans network, “What’s your favorite dive?” Isn’t that Yelp’s department? Or this one by an advertising group I belong to, “Do you believe that integrity and morals are dead?” Isn’t that a question to ponder with your inner voice?
Where are all the psychopaths that leave comments on nola.com or Youtube? I mean the kind where you are watching a yogi meditating or something and there is a comment like this one, “What is up with the nose hair?” Or the really hateful, angry messages that are readily found on nola.com, the online version of the Times Picayune, our daily here in New Orleans. How come we don’t see any of those on Facebook? Or now Linked In? Is someone censoring the real pathological depressed and rage-aholics on social media?
Sampling from nola.com:
Sweetie, you don’t know me so to publicly tag me as either a liar or stupid seems to be a tad arrogant.
[How could he have missed her name is Ovaltine?]
There was a point when Tatjana’s mother was visiting us from Croatia, where I wanted to start a company to be the opposite of Yogi tea that has those zen like sayings on their tea bags, I wanted the Eastern European socialist tea bag with messages like, “We all die alone.” What if I started the Curmudgeon AntiSocial Network where we could enjoy entries that might run the gamut of:
“I woke up this morning and remembered I work with a bunch of morons so I called in sick.”
“Have you ever notice all those people who post the most on Facebook don’t really have a life.”
“If someone asked me if I think integrity and morals are dead, I’d say dead, they’d have had to be alive first.”
“I have no precious photo to show you of my kid today because he spit yogurt on my beautiful blouse.”
I want an emoticon that has a thumbs down, a Psycho-esque outline of someone lifting a butcher knife, a woman hot flashing, and so on.
I could also post some famous lines on the CAN (the acronym for the Curmudgeon AntiSocial Network):
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness and death. ~Fran Lebowitz
@laprincessesusan – You are either lying or you are far more stupid than your posting style suggests if you seriously couldn’t find a decent nonprofit debt counseling service.