Beethoven’s Ode to Joy is a call for a return to the divine dimension of being human – fraternity, bound together in community, and all of the universal friendship tropes stitched together. Last night, I experienced this great joy. Yesterday, Friday, closing out the week, was a day of being pulled in multiple directions with the always expanding to do list that begs me to complete it and yet taunts me with additions. I got…
Over the last 24 hours, I have spoken to loved ones about connection. A friend trying to connect with her husband of decades, a mother trying to connect with her adult son, and a friend trying to connect with her sister. The building blocks of relationships are never clean – cuts are made, slights are stored, memories accumulate – and it seems nigh impossible to have a beginner’s mind with so much history calcified. I’m…
Late into a big event we had the Hall, I started limping around. I had been up since 3:30am getting ready and by the time I hit the 12-hour mark of continuous movement, lifting, squatting, my body started resisting. The very next day after lifting, moving and squatting to pick up the chairs and wipe down the tables and set up for the next event, I thought to myself – just get me through the…
Someone wrote they lost their home in Pacific Palisade, and I went online to see about the damage, having only thought of the area as L.A. – a whole swath of Southern California. Most of the Pacific Palisades headlines talked about the dangers of wanting to live in a beautiful place and how insurance was sure to leave the area. It reminded me of the aftermath of Katrina when my cousin’s husband in Florida said,…
This is my missive to you, whoever you are. I’m calling in your support in an area of my life that I need guidance with – how’s this for vulnerable? I would like to know how to do all that I want to do in life and not burn out, not exhaust myself, not end up with no time left for me. What this would look like is I could say no to doing all…
I belong to so many support groups, it is mind blowing. I’m in a parent support group, a parent coaching group, an alumni parent support group, a two-hour adult children of alcoholics group, my own therapy and then there is the improv class. The improv class is scary. Vulnerable scary. You get all your fears activated right up front – I’m not that smart, that clever, that quick, that creative – oh, the list is…
Each week, I sit in a two-hour meeting where I unravel the carefully composed narrative I have created about my family. This is the story I have told myself, as well as others, for so long. In the meeting, I’m asked to take a closer look and like any good story, there are stories hiding within the story, and none of the characters are truly who they seem at first gloss. In the long held…
The idea of a spiritual journey without a destination struck me as harsh. The journey is opening yourself up whether emotionally, spiritually, lovingly, whichever, or all together, with a destination in mind. I look for signs of spiritual, emotional, and intellectual maturity in people. I look for it in myself. The destination is right at that point of connection – did we all move up to the same wrung? Or have I rounded the bend…
“I’m going in” is what I told myself at Story Slam last night, but luckily so many people had signed up, I didn’t have to take my turn. While I was waiting, I thought about how my story was a tale of embarrassment very unlike the Christmas stories being told. I felt ambivalent leaving, in one sense I didn’t have to tell my story, but on the other hand, I know sooner or later, I…
I spent three days with my teenage son in the desert and had a realization. I’m getting older. I have been able to fake that I am 50 years older than him by keeping up with his energy level. I have a high energy level. A new realization set in when I was in a higher elevation, exhausted from waking up in the middle of the night to catch an early flight, and all the…