At some point after midnight on NYE I found myself in the bathroom with another girl who was having a moment – a moment of insecurity which was leading to tears – of course, I started crying too because that is what I do – you puke, I puke, you laugh, I laugh, you cry, I’m balling my eyes out – it’s like a gag reflex of emotions – she was crying because she can’t seem to sort out her feelings now from past hurts, I was crying because she is a beautiful woman, smart, interesting, and it bothered me that she would have any reason to be holed up in a bathroom crying on NYE. <\/p>\n
Later that evening, I was speaking to a friend of her date’s – a really great guy who I just took a liking to instantly – he said that as he moved in and around the party, he found two “real” women there – the girl I was in the bathroom with earlier and me. <\/p>\n
Be 4 Real – is a bar on Orleans Avenue across from the projects. I love that name. Being 4 real means holding in balance complex emotions – wanting someone who perhaps desires someone else or at least behaves as if he does all while not losing your own sense of worth and self-esteem. It’s a delicate balance that I feel I have mastered, but my new friend, I fear needs mentoring to get there. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
At some point after midnight on NYE I found myself in the bathroom with another girl who was having a moment – a moment of insecurity which was leading to tears – of course, I started crying too because that is what I do – you puke, I puke, you laugh, I laugh, you cry, I’m balling my eyes out – it’s like a gag reflex of emotions – she was crying because she can’t… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-852","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-main"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1kHSD-dK","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/852","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=852"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/852\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=852"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=852"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=852"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}