What? Irresponsible?<\/p>\n
The rheumy eyes were tell-tale. I told her about J trying to kiss me. The long pause. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You know why the gardener is no longer here? \u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Oh, what is the word? I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think of it. It was D\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s wedding and I had fractured both of my ankles and had taken a pain pill. He was in here working and I was lying down in there. I can remember what I was wearing \u00e2\u20ac\u201c a nightgown and a robe \u00e2\u20ac\u201c he came in and said \u00e2\u20ac\u02dclet me rub your back\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 and I thought what a compassionate man and then he turned me over and \u00e2\u20ac\u201c pause – he was in and out. Just like that [snap of the fingers]. He said, what do you think about that? And I said it is my worst nightmare. Then his wife came over here the next day screaming obscenities. And to think I almost had him drive me to the wedding \u00e2\u20ac\u201c pause – I remember you took care of me.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
This is my cue to respond sympathetically, instead I am Lady MacBeth. <\/p>\n
Coming home last night, the electricity was off at the Can and I met up with H&T and we decided to take wine, cards and candles down to the pool rather than sit in the stuffy apartments. H was talking about his father, how he often does not say the right thing at the right time \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and T said, when we were rescued here by the Black Hawk helicopters, we called him, in tears, shaking, and he said, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153That must of have been something.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d <\/p>\n
The news said we will have black outs. L said we are hanging by a thread here. Pishaw, I say. Then the morning Times Picayune affirms the precariousness \u00e2\u20ac\u201c in New Orleans, people are fighting stress, fighting hopelessness, fighting period. <\/p>\n
I grappled with my un-feeling and insensitive non-response \u00e2\u20ac\u201c don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t blame the victim I admonish \u00e2\u20ac\u201c what remains is an abhorrence of weakness I have never mastered – disgust over not protecting herself. (Or me.) <\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re now one I need to protect\u00e2\u20ac\u009d \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and N wondered why this resonated. <\/p>\n
Scientists at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle have linked risk-taking behavior in mice to a gene. Those without it prance unprotected along steel beams instead of huddling in safety like the other mice. <\/p>\n
Aversion to victimhood \u00e2\u20ac\u201c why I model the men not the women in my family \u00e2\u20ac\u201c \u00e2\u20ac\u0153you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re an enigma,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d J said to me in Purchase, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re tough, but you look girly,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d – if there is a predisposition to being a victim I will fight the good fight to my grave \u00e2\u20ac\u201c this gal will not be doomed by her own DNA. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
What? Irresponsible? The rheumy eyes were tell-tale. I told her about J trying to kiss me. The long pause. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You know why the gardener is no longer here? \u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Oh, what is the word? I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think of it. It was D\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s wedding and I had fractured both of my ankles and had taken a pain pill. He was in here working and I was lying down in there. I can remember what I was… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-283","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-main"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1kHSD-4z","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/283","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=283"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/283\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=283"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=283"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=283"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}