{"id":21440,"date":"2020-03-19T15:35:56","date_gmt":"2020-03-19T20:35:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/?p=21440"},"modified":"2020-03-19T16:58:56","modified_gmt":"2020-03-19T21:58:56","slug":"something-to-look-forward-to","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/?p=21440","title":{"rendered":"Something to look forward to"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I&#8217;m watching Ava Duvernay&#8217;s <em>When They See Us<\/em>. It&#8217;s a tough one. Tin and I watched the first episode together and I realized it was too much for him; it is too much for me. There is a scene where the family is visiting one of the boys and the mom tells him he needs to have something to look forward to and I paused &#8211; huh? &#8211; something to look forward to? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What do I have to look forward to? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are obvious answers &#8211; watching my son grow up healthy and strong. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There were the things four weeks ago &#8211; seeing the <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"100 Men Hall (opens in a new tab)\" href=\"https:\/\/the100menhall.com\" target=\"_blank\">100 Men Hall<\/a> flourish. I might have said being able to take a vacation &#8211; something along the lines of a camper with Tin, Lord Chill and Stella driving across the U.S. There was a latent desire to build a nest egg for retirement since I&#8217;ve depleted my 401k slogging through the last nine years of dwindling contract work. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Something to look forward to is special. When I was young it was about getting my book published. In my 30s and 40s, it was having a child. The future held all the magic. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now, I don&#8217;t really look forward to anything. I hone in on what&#8217;s in front of me. I go to sleep each night grateful I made it through the day. I wake up each morning grateful to be in my bed and alive. The 2005 Federal Flood, 2008 Recession, COVID-19 and the 2020 Market Crash are proof tomorrow is and will always be iffy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">On my walk this morning I saw a yesterday-today-and-tomorrow bush in full bloom. That was exciting. The Brunfelsia pauciflora is a nightshade plant endemic to Brazil &#8211; there they call it Kiss Me Quick. The flowers last for three days and change color each day &#8211; white, pink and purple. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-gallery columns-1 is-cropped wp-block-gallery-1 is-layout-flex wp-block-gallery-is-layout-flex\"><ul class=\"blocks-gallery-grid\"><li class=\"blocks-gallery-item\"><figure><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"853\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.dangermond.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_1289.jpeg?resize=640%2C853\" alt=\"\" data-id=\"21442\" data-full-url=\"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_1289-scaled.jpeg\" data-link=\"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/?attachment_id=21442\" class=\"wp-image-21442\" srcset=\" 768w,  225w,  1152w,  1536w,  1920w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.dangermond.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_1289-scaled.jpeg?w=1280 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/figure><\/li><\/ul><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m watching Ava Duvernay&#8217;s When They See Us. It&#8217;s a tough one. Tin and I watched the first episode together and I realized it was too much for him; it is too much for me. There is a scene where the family is visiting one of the boys and the mom tells him he needs to have something to look forward to and I paused &#8211; huh? &#8211; something to look forward to? What do&hellip; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21440","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-main"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1kHSD-5zO","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21440","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=21440"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21440\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21448,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21440\/revisions\/21448"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=21440"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=21440"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dangermond.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=21440"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}