Over the past days, weeks, months, however long it has been my ability to navigate has been clouded by many factors outside of my control. The situation with my mother has been obfuscated by well meaning people who have not nearly had a handle on the situation that I understood intuitively from the get go. At the same time, there has been the adoption situation that I freely gave myself over to without skepticism once…
November 25, 2009 Taurus (4/20-5/20) You need a respite from the break-neck pace of your life. Seek some downtime — you may even find yourself lost deep in thought. What you’re mulling over now may be puzzling, but the process is definitely productive. Take some free-form notes about what’s going through your head so you can refer to them later when you’re back in full operation.
I told E that I’m entering a zone where I feel like I’ve got nothing to lose and you know what, it feels pretty good.
Today as the assistant and I were washing mom, the girl told mom, “You know what I’m thinking while I wash your back? I’m thinking that I’d like to see a miracle in my day. I’d like to see you get up out of this bed. That’s the prayer I’m saying while I wash your back.” I find this incomprehensible, this talk about miracles. And I’ve seen miracles. I’ve seen my niece born one pound…
On the way to the park this morning, someone left their roller suitcase bag by the curb and obviously had ducked back in their house to get something. Loca put the skids on and then got down on all fours and crawled in a wide arc around it.
I was walking to my truck from NOAC this evening after forcing myself to go to step class. Forcing, I might add again. I parked on Basin Street. I was thinking that people who live in the suburbs would never go to a gym like NOAC, which is on the edge of the French Quarter. They most certainly wouldn’t walk to their truck parked on Basin Street. Because they’d be afraid. What they would miss…
I took the photograph of the family we met in South Carolina and set it on fire this morning. While I was watching it burn on the front brick path of the LaLa, a bird pooped on my shoulder. Now here is a couple of things I know: 1) Burning photographs or even effigies of people who have maligned me makes me happy. Take my ex whatever he was who used his child to seduce…
For all of my life my mother has been in a state of near panic over life itself. She’s not been able to enjoy even the fruits of her own labor. She’s been too anxious and worried and fearful. But yesterday she was watching this channel that the nurses put on for her with nature scenes and calming music. There was an image of a stream and woods with dappled sunlight through the leaves and…
My mom said that her dad visited her the other day. He died nearly two decades ago but it made me happy when she told me that because I would hope he and my grandmother would be somewhere around. I lay in bed the other night thinking about my loved ones who had died and that if I keep living there will be plenty more that will die. I had gone next door to my…
Monday came much sooner than I expected. One minute I was in dreamland and the next the clock said it’s late, get your lazy butt out of bed. And so hi ho, it’s off to work I go. I arrived at my desk to the usual firestorm and only just now took a breath. My mother in law sent me positive energy via a picture that speaks a 1000 words: